Be the most encouraging person you know

You are enough

In my work, I come across a lot of people who don’t realise quite how amazing they are. And they tell themselves all sorts of reasons why they can’t step up and admit to their genius – they’re too old, too young, too poor, too inexperienced, too short, too tall, too privileged, too under-privileged, too stupid, too unlucky.

Too … anything, really, that will let them off from having to be as magnificent as they are.

Why do people hold back?

There are all sorts of reasons why people might do that. You might be afraid of what your family and friends might say if you dare to try something new. You might be worried about people laughing at you if it all goes wrong.  Or you might be concerned about what might happen and how you’ll cope if you try and you fail.

And the truth is, you’re probably even more afraid about how you’ll cope if you try … and you succeed!

Fear of success

Yes, that’s right, fear of success is a very real phenomenon. And it’s driven by your instinctive urge to stay safe.  If you succeed beyond the basic survival level, you are going to have to get familiar with a whole new world.  A world of people with money, and potential, and the ability to make stuff happen. And your unconscious mind doesn’t like stuff you’re not familiar with. Because unfamiliar = potential danger.

The source of resistance

Your unconscious mind has just one job: to keep you alive.  And it wants to make its job as easy as possible.  Bobbling along at your current level, hanging around with the people you already know, doing the stuff you already know how to do … all of that is nice and safe.  Your unconscious knows that doing what you are already doing is not going to kill you. The proof is, you’re still alive.

But as soon as you start trying stuff you haven’t done before, your unconscious gets worried. It thinks it’s going to lose its ‘keeping the silly beggar alive’ bonus. So it comes up with all those convenient reasons why you can’t do it. “Not enough youthful energy” says one of its little voices. “Not enough money you can risk” says another warning voice. “Not enough relevant experience” warns another. “Not enough … not enough … not enough!”

Rationalising resistance

And then of course your conscious mind joins in, with all the reasons why things might not work, and lurid projections of all the dire consequences of failure. So those irrational unconscious blocks that you felt slightly stupid about letting them hold you back, now become logical reasons not to go ahead. And you stop, safe in the world you understand, comfortably rationalising the choice you just made.

And yet there’s a weird yearning feeling, a sense of loss, of a future almost grasped.  You sense it floating off into the aether and you’re not quite sure what just happened. You’ve made the ‘right’ decision, and yet it doesn’t quite feel right.

Know you are enough

My particular opinion on that is that when you make that ‘logical’ choice to give up on your dream, you are also making the choice to accept this false notion that you are somehow ‘not enough’.  And deep, deep down, you know that’s nonsense!

Because the universe doesn’t waste talent, and you wouldn’t have been gifted your genius if you weren’t up to the job of making good use of it.  So whenever you find yourself holding back, just ask yourself this: when will now be a good time to set aside all those reasons and excuses and be the difference you know you can be in the world?

And step up to genius!


Got you thinking … ?

If this article has got you thinking, and you would like to follow up on the ideas and see how you can get in touch with your Joyful Genius , let's have a chat!

Photo by John-Mark Kuznietsov on Unsplash

About The Author

Andrew Horder

Founder of Joyful Genius Coaching, Andrew has been working with business owners for many years, helping them find and maintain their unique focus - those activities and opportunities that they love, and will produce their success, what Andrew calls your Joyful Genius! Andrew's first book, The A to Z of Loving Work is available from Amazon

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